How do I get a divorce?

Divorce is possibly one of the most traumatic and expensive processes any person can get through. However, divorce is also incredibly common throughout the United States. Depending on the circumstances of the spouse, the divorce process differs. Long-term marriages with major property entanglements, marital debt, and small children often end in a more difficult and drawn-out divorce than short-term unions without children or property. Additionally, divorces that involve cooperative negotiation of the conditions of the divorce—including child custody, child support, property division, debt distribution, and spousal support—are less expensive and stressful than divorces involving conflict or refusal to cooperate.

Table of Contents

A few important factors to consider first such as…

Do I need a divorce lawyer?

In either an uncontested or contested divorce, you are not legally compelled to retain legal counsel. However, there are some circumstances in which getting expert help might be useful. A competent attorney will carefully review each pertinent document to make sure it is accurate and that nothing is missing. In order to keep you informed at all times, a qualified lawyer will also clarify all legal procedures pertaining to the divorce.

How long does it take to get a divorce?

In the US, divorce can be obtained in a variety of methods. Going via the legal system is occasionally the simplest option. These entail submitting pleadings, arguments, and responses and can last anywhere from three months to more than a year. It would be more difficult to carry out the fastest route. Some people will choose an uncontested divorce, which only needs a few signatures, at the same time.

What are the financial effects of getting a divorce?

When I mentioned earlier in this article that divorce is one of the most expensive processes you could ever go through, I wasn’t kidding. Divorce costs money. Alimony, child support, and property division are some of the financial repercussions of divorce, which can lead to increased debt or a doubled-up mortgage. When the primary provider loses their work, this might also result in divorce. It is difficult to determine an exact cost to all this as everyone’s situation is different. 

The legal grounds for a divorce can vary from state to state but there are only three reasons you can actually file a divorce for in the United States. They are:

  1. No-fault divorce – this is where one person wants to end the marriage and they are ending it without explaining why they are ending it. 
  2. Fault-based divorce – this allows the individual wanting the divorce to be responsible for the divorce. Basically one person is admitting the conditions in the marriage have changed and they are not blaming their ex-spouse for them. 
  3. Least-fault divorce – this allows one individual to be at less serious fault for the divorce. 

The process…

1) File the divorce petition

Before any pair may start the divorce procedure, one spouse must file a legal petition asking the court to dissolve the marriage, regardless of whether both spouses consent to the divorce or not. There are really two major factors to consider when filing for a divorce. First, before one can file for a divorce you must consider residency requirements as depending on where you live, different conditions apply to residency. Most states demand that at least one spouse reside there for three to twelve months, and for at least ten days up to six months in the county where the petition is filed. Before the court will accept the case, divorcing spouses must satisfy the state’s residency requirement.

Second, you must consider the grounds for the divorce as they vary from state to state. However, no-fault divorces are an option that all states give divorced couples. No-fault divorce is a streamlined procedure that enables partners to apply for divorce without citing a particular cause or assigning blame to either partner. Some states let parties to assign “fault” for the divorce, such as adultery or neglect, if your spouse violated the terms of the marriage or was the primary reason for the separation. If you’re not sure whether to file a no-fault or fault divorce, seek advice from an accomplished family law expert in your state.

The spouse who files must include the following details: 

  • A declaration informing the court that at least one spouse satisfies the residency criteria of the state for divorce
  • The legal reason—or grounds—for the divorce
  • Any additional statutory information that your state mandates.

2) Request temporary court orders

When you file for divorce, the court allows you to ask the court for temporary court orders for child custody, child support, and spousal support. For example, courts are aware that in some cases, such as when a stay-at-home parent is raising the children and financially reliant on their spouse, waiting months for a court to rule on a divorce is not practicable. 

If you obtain a temporary order, the court will convene a hearing, hear testimony from both spouses, and then make a decision. Usually, the judge moves swiftly to make the temporary order, which is in effect until the divorce is fully finalised or the court makes another decision.

3) Obtain and file proof of service

When you file for divorce and ask the court for temporary orders, you must provide your spouse a copy of the documents and submit proof of service to the court. With the help of this document, you can prove to the judge that you adhered to the rules for “serving” your spouse with a copy of the divorce petition. If you don’t properly serve your spouse and file the proof of service, the judge cannot move on with your divorce case.

If your spouse is on board with the divorce and is prepared to sign an acknowledgment of service, serving the papers can be simple. However, some partners—especially those who wish to prolong their marriage or complicate the divorce—can be evasive or do anything to sabotage the process. The filing spouse’s hiring of a professional who is qualified and skilled in serving legal documents to challenging parties is the simplest way to guarantee proper service. The expense is typically negligible and can help your case move along without delay. You might arrange to have the documents delivered to the lawyer’s office if your spouse hired a lawyer.

4) Negotiate terms of settlement

Both spouses must cooperate to establish an agreement when the parties hold divergent views on crucial issues like child custody, maintenance, or property distribution. The parties and their attorneys will convene at a settlement conference, which the court may occasionally schedule, to go over the progress of the case. The court may order mediation, which is a discussion between the spouses facilitated by a neutral third party with the goal of resolving any outstanding concerns. While some governments mandate mediation involvement, others do not. But for many divorcing couples, mediation is frequently a viable option because it frequently saves a considerable amount of time and money during the divorce process.

5) Trial – if needed

Despite the greatest efforts of each partner, negotiations occasionally fall short. The parties will need to petition the court for assistance, which entails going to trial, if there are still difficulties that cannot be settled after mediation and other forms of negotiation. A divorce trial is expensive, time-consuming, and gives the judge exclusive control over the situation rather than the spouses. If at all feasible, try to avoid a divorce trial because negotiations and mediation sessions provide the couple more control and more predictable outcomes.

6) Finalize the judgment

The judge’s signature on the divorce judgement marks the completion of the divorce process, regardless of whether you and your husband reached a settlement throughout the divorce procedure, or the judge made the crucial decisions for you. The judgement of divorce (or “order of dissolution”) declares the end of the marriage and outlines the terms of how the couple will divide their assets and debts, as well as how they will share parenting time and custody responsibilities. The filing spouse’s attorney normally draughts the judgement if the parties reached a settlement through negotiation. However, the judge would make the final decision if the couple went through a divorce trial.

If you need further advice in the process, please consider consulting a lawyer.

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